Drunken Brew Review: Berkshire Oktoberfest Lager


That time of the year again, time to get drunk off of fall beers and write about em. If you’re anything like us, some of the Oktoberfest-style beers actually speak to you more than the usual “fall” kind of beers. I’d substitute the flavors of the more German style, caramel-y flavors over some of the more pumpkin pie flavors any day. Berkshire Beer Co is straight out of western, MA. Which if you’re from Boston, you classify as basically anything west of Waltham. They’re known for making solid craft beers that sell for an extremely reasonable price around here in MA, and for having a pretty kickass brewery.  This bad boy clocks in at 7.5% booze which is awesome, and needless to say, it’s only around in the fall. So let’s get the party started.


Oktoberfest beers are just inherently hard to judge because they’re all trying to be the exact same thing. Personally I’m waiting to get drunk off of a beer that calls itself Oktoberfest but still tries to be different. So if you’re anything like me, you’re still going to be waiting for that “different” Oktoberfest after trying Berkshire’s offering. But Berkshire nails what it’s trying to go for mostly: a german oktoberfest that tastes like a regular German Oktoberfest. You know the flavors: malty, spice, earthiness, etc. All good shit, but again, nothing really stands out. Which puts a drunk reviewer between a rock and a hard place: be a dick and knock them points off for not reading your mind, or grade them off of what they were trying to be: a regular Oktoberfest. Well if you’ve read a sentence of this website before, you know I’m an asshole. So that’s points off from me. Now I will say the one amazing quality about this beer that sets it apart is the booze percentage. You definitely can NOT tell that it’s 7.5% Right when you drink it, you get a split second of insane flavors and intense alcohol hitting your tongue, and then it’s gone as fast as it arrived. You know another German who ruled hard and fast and then disappeared suddenly? Yeah you do. So that’s a pretty major swing in the right direction for this beer, I love beers that can pack an alcoholic punch without tasting like dirty dishwater.

How to Drink It

Now this is where it gets interesting. Because of the mix of the disappearing act of flavor, sneaky alcohol punch, and the fact that you can buy it for a reasonable price, I’m going to go ahead and say you should be drinking this as your Fall/ Halloween Party beer of choice. You can seriously get a nice buzz off the stuff all while staying in the holiday spirit. And because it doesn’t linger and is fairly light for an Oktoberfest, you can definitely play your regular drinking games with it. And if you happen to find yourself losing in a WWII-style beer pong game? Nevermind.

Wrap Up

So by now you’re probably kind of confused. On one hand, I like this shit because it’s kind of cheap and packs a punch. On the other hand, the flavor is a little bit disappointing and disappears from your mouth pretty quickly. So all in all I’d say this is an average and not extremely unique Oktoberfest, but it’s an above average and unique fall beer. Does that make sense? Probably not, but you read that we write these reviews when we’re drunk, right? So go ahead and buy some of this stuff when you have a party next time, and make all the Hitler jokes you want, because they’re a hit 100% of the time , unlike a certain German leaders’ missiles.



/ 10

~$7.00 / 22 oz



Drunken Brew Review: Foolproof Peanut Butter Raincloud


So now that it’s officially fall brew season, we’re kicking off our annual tradition like none other: getting drunk off of fall beers and writing reviews. This week’s contestant comes from the great incredibly mediocre state of Rhode Island, Foolproof Brewing’s Peanut Butter Raincloud. If you’re anything like me, your brain immediately starts thinking about Reesee’s cups when you hear the name of this beer. Encapsulates everything great about Halloween, and everyone knows the houses that hand out full-fledged Reesee’s cups (not the midget ones) are the absolute best. So needless to say we were pretty pumped about doing this review.

Now here’s my one issue with fall beers: most of them fucking suck. They’re usually just variations of the same core fall “flavors” of nutmeg, cinnamon, pumpkin, anthrax, etc. This beer is different. And it hits on something that everyone absolutely loves, and that’s peanut butter.


The number 1 thing that shines through in this beer that you wouldnt know just by looking at it is that it’s an unbelievably good porter. Even if you take out the peanut butter flavor, it’s a rock solid porter. So it’s got all of the flavors in a good porter you can expect, but here’s the twist: the peanut butter is subtle as snot. You’d think by looking at the name and seeing the label that this shit is 95% peanut butter, but there’s actually a great balance that doesn’t make you feel like you’re drinking a reese’s cup. It’s very, very drinkable, and preps your mouth hole perfectly for ingesting some more booze. Actually my biggest complaint about this beer is that they lead you into thinking youre going to be drinking an actual peanut butter cup, and then you have this beer and realize how god damn moronic of an idea that is in the first place. If you like darker beers this is quite literally the perfect fall porter.

How to Drink It

Like I said, I think this beer is best for breaking up rounds of whiskey, or some higher-octane beers. You absolutely should not be playing drinking games with this, it’s best suited for sitting around with your buddies, having a good conversation, and physically torturing your friend who has a peanut allergy. And that is what brings me to my main point: everyone has a friend that no one fucking likes. For me it’s my marketing chief at Whiskey on the House. Can’t stand the guy. But you know what he has that I don’t have? A god damn peanut allergy. So throw a koozie on this beer and talk up how good it is as you slowly hand it to him, and bingo bango your problem is solved. That’s this beer’s secret weapon, drive away those losers in the world who are allergic to peanuts. I fullheartedly don’t believe anyone is actually allergic to peanuts. So if your loser friend is willing to lie to your face like that, you should be able to knowingly serve him peanut butter beer*.

Wrap Up

Do I love this beer? Yes. Do I love the flavors and ease of drinking? Yes. Do I love sneaky putting it under my “allergic” friend’s nose and watching his throat close up? Of course not. I don’t know why anyone had to bring allergies into this conversation, I’m just here to review a beer. That being said, this is an absolutely rock solid beer. It takes the fall flavors you love but doesn’t lombardi you in the face with them, it lets you enjoy your fall and your flannel shirts without being a hipster douchebag about it. I highly recommend this beer.






*Whiskey on the House assumes zero responsibility for you having shitty friends


It’s Time: You Can Now Drink Fall Beers Without Being an Asshole. Also, Fall brew Reviews Now Live.


Fall beer has quickly become a weirdly divisive topic. Some people love fall/pumpkin beers, some people hate them. Some people go straight to Twitter to complain that late August is far too early for liquor stores to sell pumpkin beers (and they’re right), and other people count down the days until they can pop on their flannels and begin to pound some Shipyard Pumpkinheads. Well when you’re looking for correct booze opinions, you go straight to this website to tell you what the reality is. The reality is summer is dead. Finished. The second labor day is over, summer is officially in the rearview mirror. Labor Day Monday is the ultimate hangover, look yourself in the mirror and re-evaluate day. You’ve been drinking beer all summer from Thursday to Monday. You’ve been sitting in the sun all summer. It’s time to go inside. Colder weather is coming unless you live in the fairytale land parts of the country where it’s just disgustingly hot all the time. So now is when you can officially begin to go drink fall and/or pumpkin beers. Congrats, you’ve made it.


But know what the fucking problem is? A ton of fall beers blow. Some taste like weird pumpkin pies that Grandma Bertrude had accidentally left in her convection oven for a few years and you just discovered it now because she’s dead. Ok a little dark on the analogy there but I’ll chalk it up to being in the Halloween spirit. Bottom line is we got your back. We are going to bite the bullet so to speak and try as many fall beers as we can and more importantly, we’re going to tell you which ones suck and which ones are worth having, and in which setting. We’ll tell you which beers you can play beer pong with, which beers to sip casually with your buddies watching football, and which beers you shouldn’t even clean your toilet with. Our first up is going to be Foolproof’s weirdly named Peanut Butter Raincloud dropping on your eyeballs on Thursday. So gear up, get ready, and happy fall.

So Apparently America is Running out of Whiskey

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Whether you prefer your whiskey (or bourbon) on the rocks, neat, or with a diet coke, you should know that your little libation is endangered. Or as Punch so emphatically puts it, you should “brace yourself” because “the whiskey apocalypse is coming.”

Ominous, indeed – this whiskey warning comes from Buffalo Trace, one of the oldest distilleries in the country, explains Smithsonian Magazine. Apparently, producers have seen the problem coming but “its impacts are just now beginning to hit the market and will likely only worsen” in the future reports the article.

And to even further your worries (sorry, folks), Buffalo Trace released a statement this month claiming that due to the “bourbon boom… shortages still remain.”

“Despite the increase in distillation over the past few years, bourbon demand still outpaces supply. The overall bourbon category is experiencing 5% growth, but premium brands are up nearly 20% from last year… The increase in sales, coupled with the aging process and evaporation loss, leads to a shortage with no end in sight.”

Yeah – that doesn’t sound good.

Esquire also points out that as “demand for whiskey goes up, quality goes down.” The article points out Maker’s Mark PR disaster last year when the distillery tried to “water down their bourbon.” This means, finding high quality whiskies could get a lot more difficult in the future.

So, what’s a whiskey drinker to do? Well, not drinking whiskey clearly isn’t a viable option. So, as Esquire suggests, we also recommend you “buy as much as you can afford today.”

The end is near (sort of), so stock up on high quality whiskey – the good stuff – while you still can!

Via BostInno

So by now you’ve probably all heard this one before. Basically that all of America is suddenly obsessed with whiskey and we’re almost out. Well nice try Buffalo Trace but you can’t sneak this one past Whiskey on the House. This is a complete media stir to create more demand if I’ve ever seen one (I’ve never seen one). Buffalo Trace definitely just wants to say there’s a shortage so they can a) raise prices   b) lower quality without complaints c) keep demand rising until there actually is a shortage, so they can do it all again. Bullshit. Think your fake shortage scares me? Think again assholes. I love how they point to “evaporation loss.” It’s 2016 bro. I understand they still probably use the same method great Grandad Jimbo came up with shitfaced, but we got technology now. Don’t sit there and tell me you’re all just sitting around watching our whiskey evaporate and not having any clue what to do about it. So to our readers I’d like to pump the breaks on this whole whiskey story and advise everyone to go about their drinking as normal. Now excuse me while I run to the packie to buy an ungodly amount of whiskey. What, me worried?


World’s Oldest Cat, Named “Whiskey,” Dies Like A Little Bitch



A blind British cat claiming the title of the world’s oldest has died a month after his 30th birthday.

Born on August 1 1985, black and white pet Whiskey lived an equivalent of 138 human years.

Owner Lorraine Arnott, 34, was only five when he was born and they have been inseparable ever since. But when he began to lose weight and struggled to walk last week, she knew it was time for him to be put down – at 30 years, one month and 10 days old.

Ms Arnott, a school transport assistant, said: “He had been ill for a few days and he could not stand up. Unfortunately, it was time to say goodbye and I could not see him suffer. I wish it was me that died, I have lost everything and I’ve got nothing left.

“He was better than any brother or boyfriend. There will be no replacement for him. He used to give lovely kisses by putting his paws on my chest and started kissing me on the lips.”

‘It was time to say goodbye and I could not see him suffer. I wish it was me that died, I have lost everything and I’ve got nothing left…’
- Whiskey’s owner Lorraine Arnott
Ms Arnott, from Aston Clinton, Buckinghamshire, buried Whiskey – who was on medication for his ailing kidneys – in the garden on Friday, September 11.

Revealing the secret to his long life, she said she had always fed Whiskey a low-protein diet during his adult life.

“But he was fussy,” said Ms Arnott. “He’d always have a roast dinner with chicken or lamb too. In his last days, he ate 10 sachets of Morrisons cat food and he loved it. I gave him lots of love and he always slept under my duvet. He was always warm.”

Tributes to the well-loved cat have been pouring in from friends and fans and Ms Arnott expects as many cards to come in as when her other cat Rosie died aged 25. She said Whiskey’s mother, Lady, lived until 27.

Whiskey survived a fire at his home last year and Ms Arnott said he put his paw over his face to stop him breathing in smoke.

He was born with both ovaries and testes, but after an operation he was firmly a male. He lost his eyesight as a result of kidney failure.

Via The Telegraph UK


I hate pretty much everything about this story. First and foremost, fuck this world’s oldest cat. Little piece of shit lasts like a billion years, constantly plotting its silent revenge against its owner, and by all signs it never even did anything. But that’s why they call them pussies, I guess. That’s the thing with cats. Everything about them is geared towards killing humans, but they’re just too stupid to act on any of it. They walk around your house all day avoiding you, yet they’ll dart out right when you’re about to walk down the stairs. Coincidence? For sure not. It absolutely stuns me that there are people in 2016 who are actually interested in this old fucking cat. We have major cities, the internet, and even god damn handle-less segways, yet people are rallying around an old cat. An old fucking cat. That is absolutely mind bottling to me.

The overriding issue here, however, is that we’re using the human year/ cat year conversion on cats. Cats don’t get that privilege! You can translate dog years into human years because dogs are obsessed with us. They want to be human, they want to be aged in human years. Cats want your next human year to be your last one. So fuck giving them the dignity. This stupid cat died at the young age of 30. Like a little bitch.

Drunken Brew Review: Narragansett Coffe Milk Stout



Do you love iced coffee? Do you walk to Dunkin or wherever you go (besides Starbucks because fuck Starbucks) no matter how cold and shitty it is outside, and order an iced coffee every single time? Did you just answer those questions in your own head? Well guess what, pal, those were a little trick called rhetorical questions. Narragansett Coffee Milk Stout is pretty much an iced coffee with booze in it, and it’s unbelievably and undeniably awesome.


Black. It looks like black coffee. Not much else to say. There’s a nice head of foam that comes when pouring it into a glass that closely resembles coffee with cream/milk in it. Are you getting the hint that this stuff tastes like coffee?


Here we go. So much to your surprise, this beer tastes exactly like coffee. More specifically, it tastes like the perfect balance of coffee: not too bitter, not too sweet, and not overbearing. The flavor first hits you when you get some of the foam, it really eases you into the drink. When the meaty part of the beer hits your lips, that’s where you’re greeted with the finest tasting coffee this side of Colombia. This beer also lets you know that it’s a stout, but it’s not a dick about it. The theme of balance comes into play here as well, because it’s not overbearingly heavy, and it’s not water-like light, either. They did a great job of both balancing the flavor and the texture of this beer. I probably wouldn’t be able to have more than two of these in a row just because of the heartiness, but it feels perfect while you’re drinking it.

Wrap Up

Narragansett Coffee Milk Stout is one of the more balanced beers I’ve ever had. It’s easy to be balanced when you’re just making a regular, non-specifically flavored beer, but for something as hard to pull off as a coffee stout, they do an incredible job. It’s the perfect beer to have on a work lunch: you can lie to yourself saying that you’re just having a coffee to “get through the day,” and you’re just going to smell like coffee after drinking it. Making Darla from accounting say to herself “gee, that’s a goddamn winner right there. I’m going to show him my boobs later.” Or something like that.

Screen Shot 2014-06-11 at 6.25.23 PM $8.99/sixer (pints)



Drunken Whiskey Review: Woodstock Hot Licks Bourbon and Cinnamon Liqueur



It takes a man to admit he was wrong. I spent a large chuck of my life believing that any type of cinnamon “whiskey” was the drink of college girls and men with hairless balls.

Woodstock Hot Licks Bourbon slapped me in the face with the dick of truth, and showed me that not all cinnamon whiskies are created equal.

How to Drink it

“I take motherfucking shots of this stuff every morning, noon, afternoon, tea time, evening, night – fuck I even take shots of this shit when I’m asleep. It gives me wet dreams. Its the fucking best fucking shit I’ve ever fucking had the opportunity to take fucking shots of. Fuck.” – Edgar Allan Poe.

 When I first read that quote from my dear friend Mr. Poe, I thought to myself “I need to get that tattooed on my balls”. So I did. Unfortunately, I ran out of sack halfway through the quote. Some might consider this a short sighted disaster, but I don’t. You see, as I grow older, my balls will hang lower. Every year or two I’ll have a little more sack to continue the quote. Mr. Poe may have passed, but he will continue to speak to me for years to come. My scrotum will act as a medium to connect me to the afterlife.
The moral of the story kids, is that this is the best whiskey for taking shots.


You pour 1.5 ounces into your cheetah print shot glass that reads “sassy bitch”. As you raise the glass to closer to your face the strong cinnamon smell creeps up your nose and the erection is instant. As you close your eyes you breathe in, and toss the shot down your throat. The sweet and spicy taste is orgasmic. The cinnamon taste so real that you can almost taste the powdering of real cinnamon on your tongue; A phantom sensation you just can’t shake. But the honeymoon is over; You breathe out and wait for the kick…but it never comes. You open your eyes, surprised and pleased; Pouring yourself another, you remember why you’re so intoxicated this early in the night.

Wrap Up

What in the house of fucks.

Screen Shot 2014-09-25 at 3.54.56 PM   $11.00

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Drunken Brew Review: Lord Hobo Brewing Company Boomsauce IPA


Ok. We need to kick this drunken review off by addressing the absurd names being thrown around in the headline there. Let’s start with the brewery themselves. Lord Hobo. Comes in hot, forces you to buy pretty much anything they’re putting out. It also happens to be quite the interesting google search, especially when you forget to put the keyword “brewery” in at the end. Lord Hobo Brewing Company hails from the greatest state in the country, Massachusetts. Apparently it’s run by a guy named Daniel Lanigan, who used to be a bar owner but now is dabbling in the fine art of brewing. He’s opened and established several great bars in Boston and also in Baltimore, and now he’s running a gigantic brewery out of Woburn, MA, and this Boomsauce IPA is his flagship brew. So yes, we did buy this beer solely because of it’s name. But your third grade teacher who told you not to judge a book by its cover also told you that picking your nose in public is wrong. And we all know that’s the stupidest shit we’ve ever heard. So let’s get into it.

How to Drink It

To be completely honest, Lord Hobo Boomsauce IPA is really one of those beers that should be drank at a bar and at a bar only. Ordering this on tap and having it in a real glass brings out the ridiculous flavors that are going on in it. Pretty much your 1 way to go here. But 1A is definitely to buy it at a packie (that means liquor store) in the tall boy cans. The cans themselves along with this IPAs astounding drinkability will allow you to drink this bad boy while playing some low-key drinking games. Think card games, something along the lines of the lovingly named “Fuck the Dealer” or “Irish Poker” or something like “Horserace.” Or if you’re playing any kind of video game drinking game (we recommend Mario Party). The bottom line is this: there’s enough of a flavor depth to want to drink this at a bar and enjoy it, but it’s drinkable enough and high enough in alcohol, 7.4%, to help you out in your pre-game this weekend.


Lord Hobo Boomsauce IPA takes all the normal flavors you’d think about in an IPA: hops, floral, bitterness, and seemingly runs it through a filter. Don’t get me wrong, I have no idea what or how they do it, but it tastes like it’s purified somehow. Makes some other IPAs taste like tap water while you’re drinking bottled. Which is what leads me to the main point: it’s fucking drinkable. If you read our reviews often, we like to get drunk. This means that when we have some of these high-octane IPAs that fill you up after six sips, we don’t like it, because that means we cannot get drunk off of it. So when an IPA comes along that lends itself to normal drinking, let’s just say there’s some movement in the pants area. Only other flavors to add is a scent of pine and an amazing aftertaste. You know that the brewer’s homebrewing background really comes out in spades with this Lord Hobo Boomsauce IPA.

To keep it fair, the only negatives I can find with this beer is the price itself. It’s definitely overpriced at $15.00 for a 4 pack, but let’s hope this gigantic brewery can help lower the costs down a bit in the future. Other than that, if you don’t like strong IPAs than you shouldn’t be drinking this. If you do, we think you’ll love the drinkability and the flavor depth.

Wrap Up

Lord Hobo Brewing Company is a well-named brewery that seems to have a bright future ahead of it. And when they came up with the name “Boomsauce” for their IPA, let’s just say they had a lot to live up to. And they did. If they can work on lowering their price, the sky seems to be the limit for this beer and the brewery itself. Great brew.


Drunken Brew Review: Victory Brewing HopDevil IPA



HopDevil is an American IPA brewed by Victory Brewing Company out of PA. Apparently Victory uses some hop-press machine that squeezes all the flavor out of their hops, almost like a French Press but for drunks. It clocks in at 6.7% ABV and 50 IBUs. To be completely honest, we only wanted to try this brew out for a couple basic reasons: 1) we love IPAs 2) we love satan. Victory Brewing offers a good amount of beers, most notably for me their Belgian style “monkey beer” (I have no idea what it’s called but it has a monkey with I think 14 paws on it so it’s awesome). So here we go.



The Pour

First of all, if you’re not drinking HopDevil IPA in a glass you should find the nearest bridge and walk backwards off of it. I swear to you it tastes like a completely different beer when you drink it out of the glass compared to out of the bottle. The foam layer that comes out is moderately thick, and does a nice job of sticking to the glass as you down it. And more importantly, the foam tastes fucking delicious. Since we haven’t done a beer review in quite some time, I will reiterate: if you actually care about the pour of your beer you’re an asshole, we’re just letting you know how to get the most out of this brew. So let’s get to what really matters: the flavor.


HopDevil IPA fills your nozzle with scents of flowers and citrus before you take a sip. Which is awesome. Once you take a gulp, though, that’s pretty much where the awesome stops for me. The flavor profile is as follows: citrus (think orange, grapefruit, lemon, orange peel, etc), soap, and floral flavors from the hops. You may have missed it, but there’s one flavor in that profile that kind of sort of stands out. The aftertaste really hits on that soapy flavor, and that’s something that flat out confused my mouth. Is this the devil finally washing my mouth out with soap for not praising his name enough? Luckily these flavors disappear pretty quickly, but all that means is that there isn’t much depth to the beer itself. It actually tastes more like a light IPA, which is bullshit. I get it, I deserve to get my mouth cleaned out with soap, but that plus alcohol has a strange punisher-rapey vibe to it, and that’s not exactly what I’m looking for in a beer. I mean it’s close, but not quite there.


Wrap Up

Victory HopDevil IPA just screams “meh.” It’s nothing special. Does it deserve to have (hail) Satan on the label? Absolutely not. But does it deserve a shot? Yes absolutely. So go ahead, try this guy out, but maybe try it as a single brew, because I don’t think I’ll be drinking the other five in my sixer. Maybe I’ll consider them a sacrifice to the one and only S-Dawg.


Drunken Whiskey Review: Old Overholt Rye Whiskey


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I’ll never forget the first time I had Old Overholt. I originally bought it because it was cheap, rye, and had a weird picture of George Washington (I think?) on the label.  Little did I know that this whiskey is the dark horse of all dark horses.  Absolutely do not be fooled by the $20/liter price tag, because this shit is absolutely legit. Through the years it sticks with you, as I’m finding that it’s carried by more and more packies, it’s a great go-to for parties and more.


 How To Drink It

This is an extremely balanced whiskey, meaning it’s good in almost any setting, but I think it really is best for cocktails. Old fashioneds, whiskey sours, manhattans, etc. This whiskey does’t just hold its weight in cocktails, it really amplifies the flavor while still giving you that bite you want out of a rye. Drinking it full strength tastes like a mixed drink itself because there are so many flavors going on, but taking a shot of this may burn your throat off/send you into a Patriotic American coma.



You gotta love the flavor of this whiskey, even without considering the price. It goes down nice and smooth but lets you know it’s a pure American Rye with every sip. It is not at all harsh, but it’s also not a pussy rye drink (looking at you, JP). There’s a hint of corn that comes with the aftertaste, but all in all it makes you feel like George Washington drinking freedom. I know I just said that it’s best for cocktails, but this shit stands on its own when you drink it straight up or on the rocks.


First Words: Spice. City.

Overall Old Overholt is officially my go-to rye whiskey when I can find it in the store. It’s cheap, mixes great, and tastes perfect full strength or over ice. And to top it all off, you get a liter of it so it will last you that much longer (or get you that much more fucked up).

Wrap Up

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