Category Archives: Fall Brews and How-To’s

Drunken Brew Review: Narragansett Coffe Milk Stout

2014-11-04-gansett-690x299

Intro

Do you love iced coffee? Do you walk to Dunkin or wherever you go (besides Starbucks because fuck Starbucks) no matter how cold and shitty it is outside, and order an iced coffee every single time? Did you just answer those questions in your own head? Well guess what, pal, those were a little trick called rhetorical questions. Narragansett Coffee Milk Stout is pretty much an iced coffee with booze in it, and it’s unbelievably and undeniably awesome.

Color

Black. It looks like black coffee. Not much else to say. There’s a nice head of foam that comes when pouring it into a glass that closely resembles coffee with cream/milk in it. Are you getting the hint that this stuff tastes like coffee?

Flavor

Here we go. So much to your surprise, this beer tastes exactly like coffee. More specifically, it tastes like the perfect balance of coffee: not too bitter, not too sweet, and not overbearing. The flavor first hits you when you get some of the foam, it really eases you into the drink. When the meaty part of the beer hits your lips, that’s where you’re greeted with the finest tasting coffee this side of Colombia. This beer also lets you know that it’s a stout, but it’s not a dick about it. The theme of balance comes into play here as well, because it’s not overbearingly heavy, and it’s not water-like light, either. They did a great job of both balancing the flavor and the texture of this beer. I probably wouldn’t be able to have more than two of these in a row just because of the heartiness, but it feels perfect while you’re drinking it.

Wrap Up

Narragansett Coffee Milk Stout is one of the more balanced beers I’ve ever had. It’s easy to be balanced when you’re just making a regular, non-specifically flavored beer, but for something as hard to pull off as a coffee stout, they do an incredible job. It’s the perfect beer to have on a work lunch: you can lie to yourself saying that you’re just having a coffee to “get through the day,” and you’re just going to smell like coffee after drinking it. Making Darla from accounting say to herself “gee, that’s a goddamn winner right there. I’m going to show him my boobs later.” Or something like that.

Screen Shot 2014-06-11 at 6.25.23 PM $8.99/sixer (pints)

 

 

Drunken Pumpkin Beer Review: Two Roads Roadsmary’s Baby

Intro

Screen Shot 2014-09-18 at 10.38.26 AMSo Two Roads Roadsmary’s Baby out of Connecticut is picking up steam recently, much ado to their pun name I’d assume. I’m starting to see it at more and more bars, but I’m also starting to see it spelled wrong on more menus than I can count. Bartenders seem to think that they can just serve us the Rosemary’s Baby movie and call it a day. Newsflash, hombre. I can’t drink a DVD. So here we go:

How to Drink It

Definitely need to put this guy in a glass (see the color section). Not only does it seem to give you a much fuller flavor, it allows you to put some cinnamon and sugar on the rim if that’s your sort of thing.

Color

The color is a dark amber/brown that hides the carbonation bubbles fairly well, making it appear to be a very full and complex brew. The foamy head is off-white and bubbly, but disappears or sort of settles down pretty quickly after pouring. It’s a fairly “clean” brew, meaning the foam didn’t stick down the glass while we drank it.

Flavor

The first thing you’ll notice is the strong pumpkin flavor. But it’s not the typical, Shipyard-esque pumpkin, it actually tastes like a real pumpkin. As it goes down your gullet you get that cinnamon, nutmeg, and actually a pinch of salt. It’s a great combination of flavors and they balanced it very well. What I also like about this beer, especially in terms of fall/pumpkin beer, is it’s alcohol strength. This bad boy clocks in at 6.8%, which is much higher than the average pumpkin beer. And you can taste that strength. Too many pumpkin beers run into the problem of being a too sweet version of Coors Light, and Roadsmary’s Baby definitely stays away from that.

Wrap Up

If you’re in the mood for a fall beer that will still give you the kick you’re looking for. Here is where I’d make a reference to Rosemary’s Baby, however I am not 80 years old so I’ve never seen it. Definitely one of the stronger options we’ve seen as far as a pumpkin beer that you can find at some bars.

Screen Shot 2014-09-18 at 11.08.09 AM

pumpkin beer/5

 

 

 

Drunken Review: Pumpkin Beer Review: The Pumking

pumpkin beer review

So this fall we’re going to be reviewing slash mostly just telling you about some awesome fall brews. To start out is The Pumking from the Southern Tier Brewing Company. Now we haven’t ever done beer reviews before so here we go.

Intro

First off, this is one of those fall brews that you buy in the legit craft beer section. You get one of those 22 Oz bottles for a pretty premium price, and it’s an event when you get to drink it. Now it is available on tap in many locations, and it’s available in regular six packs as well, but their most common distribution method for this bad boy is in the 22 oz fashion.

How to Drink It

DEFINITELY put this guy in a glass to fully enjoy it. You’ll want to see the medium orange and light brown colors and consistency of this beer while you drink it, and you’ll also want to smash your glass when you’re finished and declare yourself the Pumpkin King.

Color

Like I said above, this beer looks like how a fall beer should. It is a dark to medium orange to light brown color, which is a little lighter than usual, but all it does is allow for the drinker to see more of the carbonation and foam.

Flavor

This flavor is really complex for a pumpkin beer. Meaning it’s not just pumpkin pie (which is fucking awesome don’t get me wrong, I just can’t drink a shitload of pumpkin pie). The pumpkin is what hits you right off the bat, followed by cinnamon, vanilla, and the key differentiator of this guy: spice. Spice hits your tongue from start to finish, and blends in well with the relative sweetness. That is really the only downside for me, as it was just a little sweet for my taste, but my tolerance for sweetness is really low.

Smell

I don’t know if you’re like me, but smell has a lot to do with how much I like a certain beer (Coors Lights and Narragansett aside). But fall beers are like scented fucking candles, so we need to include smell as apart of the rating. This beer smells like your grandmother’s house in November. It smells like how it probably smells like when you sit down, light a candle, crack open a beer, and put on the Nightmare Before Christmas every fall/winter.

Wrap Up

Overall it’s a great beer. Not sure if it warrants the price tag when it comes to the 22 Oz variety, but the flavors are complex, the color is great, and it smells like home made pumpkin pie. My only gripes were with the sweetness, but that usually comes with the territory of pumpkin beer.

pumpkin beer4/5

$8.99 for 22 Oz

pumpkin beer review

 

Halloweekend 2015 Is Shaping Up To Be The Perfect Storm Of Drunkenness

I’ve said this a thousand times before. Halloween is the single greatest drinking holiday on the calendar. Think about it. There are zero family obligations attached to Halloween, zero religious attachments, and it is 1000% accepted and expected that everyone at your Halloween party gets blackout drunk. And the sneaky best part? You get to wear masks. So even if by some chance you’re being judged for being as drunk as you are, boom you pop on a mask and suddenly it looks like you’re The Scream. And everyone knows The Scream is always sober. In fact it actually looks like The Scream guy is constantly stuck in a state of being hungover:

 

 

So that’s pretty much as sober as you can get, really. So take a load off this weekend, buy yourself some pumpkin brews that have been drunkenly reviewed by your boys here at Whiskey on the House, and get as drunk as you possibly can. Oh and I almost forgot to mention the fact that DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME is on Halloween into November 1st. That is absolutely crazy to be considering DST has always been a complete joke. DST is no longer a waste of time, but it is actually giving us all more time to get wasted. That was eloquent as shit.

Pumpkin Beer Review: Harpoon UFO Pumpkin

Intro

UFO-Pumpkin-bottle-glassMaybe it’s an East Coast bias that I have with Harpoon. Maybe it’s the fact that I like making harpoon-dick jokes when I drink it. Maybe go fuck yaself. I generally like the kinds of offerings they put out, and I’m always impressed by their variety. So it’s a no-brainer that we review their UFO Pumpkin. Now “UFO” means “unfiltered offering” where they skip the last stage of the filtering process, which is designed to give a fuller, more open flavor. So let’s see how they did.

How to Drink it

Personally I liked this brew poured out into a glass, because the smell is exactly what you’d want out of a pumpkin beer, and I just didn’t quite get enough of it when drinking it out of the bottle. So go ahead, give it a nice pour that will really bring out the colors and the smells of this bad boy.

Color

When you pour it out, you definitely see sort of a charred copper/ light brown color that really lets you drink it with your eyes before you start downing it. There’s definitely a hefty head to this beer when you pour it out, but it vanishes rapidly upon raising the glass. Overall it’s a very appealing looking beer, and you can tell that it being unfiltered helps because it gives off a hefty vibe before you start drinking it.

Flavor

The first thing I got when I tasted it is banana bread. No clue if they used any banana or any fucking bread, but that’s what I got. After that, you start to taste the malt, pumpkin, and cinnamon/sugar. What I personally liked also was the presence of hops in this pumpkin beer. Not necessarily tart or anything like that, but they complimented the pumpkin/squash flavors well and ensured that this pumpkin beer didn’t end up tasting like a dessert. This is definitely one of the more drinkable offerings for this season, as most pumpkin beers end up leaving you feeling like you just ate a pumpkin pie after two beers. So drink up.

Wrap Up

Harpoon’s Unfiltered Offering of  pumpkin did not disappoint. It’s a full, flavorful, and aromatic beer that does not fall into the trap of being too sweet, or knocking you on your ass with pumpkin/ fall spice flavors. Again, if you’re looking for a pumpkin beer that you can actually sit down and drink a shit load of, this is it. So buckle in, pick up a twelve pack, and get your power hour on.

Screen Shot 2014-09-25 at 9.28.15 AM  $8.99/ sixer

pumpkin beer/5

 

How To: Make a Badass Pumpkin Keg

 

Pretty simple procedure here that will help your upcoming halloween or fall party not be awful.

 

1) Carve out the top lid of the pumpkin and scoop out all of that weird brain looking shit. If you have the time/brain in your head, save the seeds and roast em up with some salt and pepper in the oven, it’s fucking incredible.

2) Look for a spot on the low end of the pumpkin, this is where you’re going to carve out for your spigot. Hold the spigot up to the pumpkin and trace the circle around it so you’ll know where to cut. Then, you guessed it, cut. You’ll probably have to cut out your spigot hole a little from the outside and a little from the inside because pumpkins are tough tamales.

3) Screw in your faucet and handle, pour the beer in, and let the bitches come running to you because you just make a pumpkin keg.

 

Fall Beer Review: Sam Adams Fat Jack

Intro

14-thumb-300x401-81045

When we found out that we were going to start reviewing a shitload of fall beers here at Whiskey on the House, I definitely wanted to review Sam Adams Fat Jack at some point. Year after year it’s generally a pretty solid go-to in terms of a fall beer, and this year seemed to be no different. I’ve personally never seen this sold in a sixer. Maybe you can only buy ‘em in the pint and six ounce form, maybe they just don’t sell ‘em in sixers by us, maybe go fuck yourself. But I digress, so here we go.

Color

This beer pours out really thick. If you don’t drink this beer out of a glass, then you can go fuck yourself. It’s a great looking caramel brown color, and the head pours out pretty thick, but dissipates extremely quickly, as we’re beginning to see with a lot of pumpkin beers. But seriously, use a glass.

Flavor

Sam Adams uses 28 pounds of real pumpkin per barrel of this shit. How fucking insane is that? 28 pounds of god damn pumpkins! How are they not going extinct? You can definitely tell when taking your first couple sips. It’s REALLY pumpkin-y. Other than that, the major flavors are pretty much what you’d expect, heavy spice and smoky malts. There’s also kind of a sour aftertaste that isn’t exactly welcomed or wanted, but it’s a solid reminder that you are not, in fact, drinking a fucking Pumpkin Spice Late from fucking Starbucks. In terms of smell, stick your nose in this shit. All you can smell is an alcohol-infused Thanksgiving dinner (so all Thanksgiving dinners). The smell is something else. Really. Stick your nose in this shit. I dare ya.

Wrap Up

This is one of the more unique pumpkin or fall beers you can try. From making sure that you drink it out of  a glass, to sticking your fucking nose in the stuff, to having to suddenly accept a sour aftertaste, it is a little demanding on you. But then again, think back to the hottest chick you know, they’re all pretty demanding.

 

Screen Shot 2014-10-08 at 6.49.59 PM

$7.99 for a big boy (pint and six ounces)Screen Shot 2014-10-08 at 6.51.52 PM

 

Fall is Officially Here

 

 

This is it, folks. Fall is officially upon us. Time for pumpkin beers, changing colors of the leaves, and getting drunk without sweating your balls off. It really is a beautiful time of the year.

Find our Fall Brew Reviews Here

And recommend some new fall beers for us to review on our Twitter and Instagram

Happy fall everybody, we hope to get some good recommendations and do what we do best: get drunk and write about it. Don’t be afraid to send us some good whiskey reviews, too. Or bad. Bad whiskey is usually way more fun to write about if we’re being honest.